"Guess not," Spike murmured, following a step behind Xander. Giles had called Xander to request that he come out to patrol. It seemed that the Slayer and her Watcher were concerned that they hadn't gotten rid of all the hellhounds. As a result, Giles wanted Xander to go out into the streets, armed with some special hellhound-fighting weaponry, to clean up the last of the problem. Of course he, Xander that is, was more then welcome to track down Spike if he wanted help. Actually, what Giles really meant was that he didn't want to try to find the vampire, so Xander needed to do that as well.

"But I *hate* hellhounds. And I had plans for tonight," Xander whined. He wanted to spend some more quality time with Spike, maybe out somewhere. Xander's eyes blurred as he thought about The Absinthe Club and the movie theatre. Oh, if he could get Spike back in one of those places...

"Shouldn't take too long," Spike murmured absently. "Haven't seen one yet, and it's been an hour already."

"True," Xander conceded. "Wanna swing by the Bronze on the way home?" He asked, grinning evilly.

Spike frowned. No, he didn't want to go to the Bronze. Nor did he want to visit a coffee shop, the all-night grocery, or any of the other places Xander had mentioned so far that night. "Not really," He admitted reluctantly, hoping he wasn't offending Xander. Spike really wanted to spend the remainder of the night at home, in bed, buried deep inside his lover's warm body.

Xander huffed. "So pretty much everything in Sunnydale's out," He snapped. "Is there anywhere you are willing to go?" He couldn't help but feel a bit paranoid; Spike didn't want to be seen anywhere with him. Maybe he'd done too much, been too risqué. The vampire seemed to have enjoyed the club, and hadn't complained at all about the theatre. He'd never asked, though, if that's what Spike wanted. After all, Spike seemed to enjoy the 'almost getting caught' aspect of some of their activities. He'd been the one to initiate them with a quick handjob in an alleyway...

"Home?" Spike ventured tentatively. A warm mug of blood, a lapful of even warmer Xander, the time to savor every part of his boy's body... Spike's thoughts were interrupted by a rather unhappy Xander.

"Fine. Home. We'll go back to the apartment and hide out for a while. Maybe even turn on the TV and watch fucking basketball. Or maybe I'll just go hang out on the site, you know--sleep in the office, now that I've got the keys. Or the crypt. No one's moved in there, I'm sure. Dust and cobwebs don’t appeal to many people."

Spike found himself most confused. Xander sounded angry. "I thought... bloody hell, Xander, what's wrong with spending some time at home?" What was the boy talking about, sleeping in the office?

"What's wrong with going out?" Xander shot back irately.

Spike frowned. "Nothing, but we've gone out a lot lately. Just thought we might stay home."

Xander exploded. "Why? Embarrassed to be seen with me? Tired of it? Suddenly changed your mind?" He punctuated each word with a jab at Spike's chest. The vampire soon found himself backed against a wall. Xander thrust against him, grinding their bodies together. They made a lewd picture; two gasping, panting men writhing together in the shadows. "Don't like this anymore? Decided that maybe high-school loser freaks aren't worth your time? Or will I hurt your image? Big Bad fucks Slayer lackey. Must not do much for your good name, huh, Spike?"

"What're you going on about?" Spike asked hoarsely. He tried to get control of Xander, to separate them long enough to figure out what was going on. But when he grabbed the boy's arms, Xander twisted. Spike's fingers wrenched human skin through layers of fabric, tearing strong skin ever so slightly.

Xander gritted his teeth against the tight, ripping pain in his arms. Spike was not so controlled. The vampire's head whipped back as his entire body stiffened. A pained howl poured through the night, startling some fledgling vampires who were prowling nearby. They ran away, sure that whatever had just caused that noise would soon come after them.

"Spike..." Xander whispered, backing away, rubbing at his arms. Spike had hurt him. He'd hurt Spike. He'd assaulted Spike, in the street.

The slap-slap of tennis shoes on pavement struck a heartbreaking counterpoint to the pulsating agony in Spike's head as the vampire struggled to recover. He had to get himself together; Xander had just run away. It didn't take long for Spike to pull himself away from the wall and start after Xander.

Xander ran through dark, abandoned streets, passing row after row of houses, all of them full of happy, contented people. He was neither of those things at the moment. His brain was screaming at him, damning him for everything he'd done to Spike, to himself. Xander kept going, running faster than he ever had before, faster than he'd run when he'd had hellhounds on his tail. He ran and ran, finally veering off pavement and onto the grassy bank of a highway overpass. He skidded to keep from tumbling down the embankment, coming to a gradual stop near the bottom. The road was quiet, with no traffic in either direction. Xander stared up at the sky, studying the opaque strip of dark that was the bridge above him. If he squinted, he could just see the tangled girders that made up the understructure, riveted metal waiting to bear the burdens of rush hour traffic.

Spike pushed himself as hard as he could to follow Xander's scent through town. When he drew near the highway, the vampire began to worry even more. Surely Xander wouldn't do anything rash. Spike clung to that feeble hope as he began to search for the boy.

Xander watched silently as Spike wandered under the bridge. At the moment, the vampire couldn't see him, didn't know he was there. Maybe if he stayed perfectly still...

Spike was about to give up and try another path when he heard it. There, to his left... if he stood very still, he could hear a heartbeat. Not just any heart, but one he'd laid his head on, slept next to for so many glorious months. Golden eyes turned to the bridge above him as Spike began to look for Xander once again.

As Spike got closer and closer to his hiding place, Xander began to understand how Spike had become a master vampire. The blonde was amazing to watch; fluid movements that were eerily silent, unblinking eyes missing nothing. Xander felt like a mouse, cowering in the back of the python's cage.

Spike's eyes never left Xander as he climbed into the web of steel beams that supported the bridge. Xander had gotten himself a good bit out, wedged into a particularly thick section of supporting steel ropes. Spike kept his movements slow, not wanting to scare Xander and make him move. Spike wouldn't be seriously harmed by an unplanned plunge to the street below, but it would probably kill the human.

Xander tensed as Spike settled onto a beam next to him. "Hi," Spike murmured, staring at his hands. "Nice night for a stroll."

Xander laughed harshly. "Sure, whatever you say, Spike."

"You ran away," Spike stated softly, now watching a few wispy clouds drift over the heavy moon.

"I hurt you," Xander replied.

"I hurt you too," Spike countered.

"You didn't mean to," Xander rationalized.

"But you meant to hurt me?" Spike asked curiously.

"Yes... no..." Xander thumped his head against the metal supporting him. "I didn't want to hurt you; I just wanted to..."

Spike waited, tongue caught between his back teeth. Waiting for Xander to say something. Anything. To let him know if it was ok to touch, to leave, to...

"Do I disgust you?" Xander asked, staring out into the night. "I thought you liked what we do together. Shocking the locals."

"I...love what we've got, Xander," Spike whispered. "More than you realize."

"Then what's wrong? Why are you being so... over there and not over here?" Xander asked brokenly. "You want to go home, hide, keep out of sight. I thought you liked it...I guess I was wrong."

Spike let his eyes slide closed. He hated this, hated it more than the chip that kept him half-neutered. Every time they got to a good spot, either his or Xander's insecurities reared their ugly heads and got in the way. "I love you, Xander."

Xander winced. How could Spike love him? He was nothing; he couldn't do anything right, not even figure out what Spike wanted out of him, if indeed the vampire did want anything out of him.

"I'm sorry if that's not what you wanted to hear," Spike continued. "But it's the truth. The rest of it doesn't matter. None of it does."

"I'm sorry," Xander murmured. "It won't happen again."

Spike smiled sadly. "Don't be too sure," He murmured. The boy probably didn't even know what he was apologizing for. He really wished, though, that they didn't have to get into this *again*.

Xander winced. "You're right. I'll keep fucking up, again and again." He huddled deeper into the steel girders, trying to fold into himself.

Spike gritted his teeth, biting back a snarl. He maneuvered himself up and swung over to where Xander was hiding. "You didn't fuck up," Spike growled. He straddled Xander's lap, weighting the young man down. "What you did was get mad. Then you lost your temper. It happens, Xander."

"I hurt you!" Xander shouted, looking anywhere but at the vampire who was so close to him.

"Christ in a fucking handbag, I can't take this anymore!" Spike screamed. "Xander, all you did was what any insecure, self-loathing man would do; you convinced yourself that you're bloody well worthless and then you got mad at me for just being here."

"How would you know?" Xander hissed, pushing ineffectually at Spike's shoulders. The vampire was leaned right up against him, face just inches from his own. It was damned hard to ignore the blonde when he was in that position.

"Do you really think I'm just sitting about all day, watching the telly without a thought in my pretty little head?" Spike asked roughly. "That I don't wonder every blasted day why you're letting an impotent, has-been vampire stay in your flat, sleep in your bed and touch you? 'Cause I do, you know."

"I love you," Xander sighed, now looking at Spike's hands as they ghosted over his arms.

"Ah," Spike murmured. "And that's it? You love me?" The vampire chuckled dryly. "Is that supposed to make me feel better? That I have your love? What does that get me, hmm? A warm shower and a few less insults at the Magic Box?"

Xander's head whipped up. "Shut the fuck up, Spike! It means everything to me. I want you because I love you. Nothing else matters, not your chip, not the demon... nothing."

"Thin reasoning there, Xan. After all, I love you and that doesn't mean shit," Spike replied gently. "Hmm?"

Xander wilted. Damn, he hated it when he got out-logicked. Happened all the time, though, so he should've seen it coming. "You fucking bastard."

Spike grinned. It was clear that Xander had, at least for the moment, decided to not continue the self-hating rant he'd been on. "Not yet, luv," He said, rolling his hips against Xander's. "But you could do something about that. Wouldn't mind a bit."

Xander frowned. "I thought you didn't like the whole in-public thing," He said. At the same time, Xander's hands came up to grasp Spike's hips, pulling the vampire closer.

Spike let Xander draw him down. "Like it fine," He murmured, resting his head on Xander's shoulder. "Like it at home, like it on the road. I like it in the club--"

"In the pub?" Xander ventured. "In the flat? On the mat? In the shower? On the water tower? With some milk? Rubbed by silk? On the rug? With a plug?"

"Fuck me already," Spike snarled. He reached into his duster, extracting an ever-present tube of lubricant. Xander took the tube as it was thrust into his hand. As soon as he'd accepted it, Spike leaned back and began to unfasten his jeans.

Xander wasted no time. As soon as Spike had his jeans shucked down to his thighs, the boy had a finger inside him. Spike froze, shuddering, as Xander began to stretch him. Xander used his free hand to bring Spike closer to him, even as the vampire braced himself on the nearby beams.

"Harder," Spike panted, working himself back on Xander's fingers. "Come on, Xander, gimme more." The emotional intensity of the past hour was quickly transforming into breathtaking physical need. Spike craved this contact, raw and utterly sexual. He needed Xander beneath him, inside him, surrendering so that he could take Spike.

Xander unzipped himself and withdrew his fingers from Spike's body. He slicked his cock with a bit more lube, and then guided Spike down. As soon as he felt the blunt tip of Xander's cock against him, Spike lunged down, taking the boy inside him all at once.

Both human and vampire cried out as they were joined. Xander's breath was taken away by the incredible, tight coolness that surrounded him. Spike was burned by his lover's blood heat, cock stretching him to capacity. "Move," Xander panted, bracing his feet next to Spike's and wrapping his hands around the blonde's hips. Spike lifted up, guided by Xander, and then was yanked back down.

Xander watched Spike's face morph, the boy's cock pulsing with arousal. He loved it when Spike was this feral, this raw and unrestrained. The vampire was riding him furiously, working himself on Xander's cock with brutal force. Xander met him thrust for thrust, loving the way Spike's back arched and the muscles of his neck stood out as he writhed.

Spike clenched himself around Xander on the next upstroke, growling at the feel of cotton knit catching on his cock, Xander's baggy t-shirt rubbed against him with every movement, like a feathery hand stroking him. Xander was back with him, in him, taking him in, accepting him for what he was. His boy was back where he belonged, inside and beside and underneath and on top of Spike. It didn’t matter how many times Spike had to do this, had to chase Xander down and convince him that he was loved, so long as each time it worked and Xander stayed with him.

Xander moved one hand to Spike's cock, stripping that hard flesh with rough strokes. He was close, so close he could feel the come gathering, pushing its way out, wanting to flood Spike's cold body with its warmth. Xander wanted Spike with him, wanted that cold seed to spill on his hand, on his skin. Xander let is shirt get rucked up as they hurtled towards orgasm, baring his sweat-slickened skin to the cool night air.

Spike looked down at Xander, struck by the sight of his lovely boy, face flushed and eyes bright. He saw a strong hand wrapped around his own pale cock. Then the vampire's body stopped. Every nerve that could began to sing, all vibrating at the same frequency. Glowing, demonic eyes watched as his seed coated Xander's hand, flowing out onto silky skin, spattering over cheap cotton. Then ecstasy slammed into him and he saw no more.

Xander watched Spike climax, greedily taking in the shocked, naked expression, the consuming pleasure that always overcame the vampire. It was almost enough to push Xander over the edge. What did it for him, though, was the feel of Spike's come spilling out into his hand and cover his stomach. Thick, bittersweet fluid, marking him more surely than the scars on his neck. He was Spike's. The vampire had claimed him time and again, marking him with his scent as he gifted Xander with his pleasure. As the boy's orgasm overcame him, he swore that he'd start believe it, start having a bit of faith in his lover when Spike chanted 'mine' as they came together.

It was the uncomfortable jab of a steel beam into his back that kept Xander from simply falling asleep. Spike, having available to him the much more comfortable bed that was Xander, was oblivious to his surroundings. "Spike?" Xander murmured. When he got no response, he shifted slightly, disturbing the vampire's rest.

"Hmm?" Spike hummed, body still fairly ringing with pleasure.

"Twenty-five," Xander said, smacking the vampire's ass. "Can we go home now?"