::You just want to piss off Angel by shagging in his hotel,:: Spike accused.

::So do you,:: Xander shot back.

Wesley grinned. ::Torturing Angel is a noble pursuit, I must agree. However, first we need to focus on Lilah. She is easily underestimated.::

::She tried to seduce you,:: Xander commented.

::You did shag her,:: Spike added.

::I don’t need reminding,:: Wesley spat.

Xander reached over and rubbed the older man’s head, ruffling his hair. ::Aw, you know we love you.::

Spike’s face took on an odd pallor; he looked stricken. Xander felt the man’s distress. ::We love you too, you know,:: He told the redhead.

::I know,:: Spike conceded. After all, he could feel it. ::But I don’t know why. Is it the Altenalium?::

::Yes,:: Wesley said firmly. ::In the same way that Angel’s mission is responsible for making Cordelia love him.::

Xander smiled and nodded. He understood what Wesley was saying. Yes, the Altenalium was responsible for their coming together. If not for it they wouldn’t have ever gotten this close. But even after a few days, their relationship had grown beyond the weapon.

::Yeah,:: Spike said quietly. He was only partially mollified, but it was enough for now. They had work to do.

•••

“Man, evil lawyering *really* pays,” Xander muttered as they stopped in front of Lilah’s door.

“Whoring oneself out to the devil is lucrative,” Wesley agreed. He raised his hand to knock, and then paused. ::Spike, would you do the honors?::

Spike’s grin was black. He raised one thickly booted foot and destroyed the door, leaving only a few bits of wood dangling from the hinges. He loved being able to just smash his way into a human’s home, not constrained by needing an invitation. ::How was that?::

::What, you think we’re gonna cream because you’re doing the Big Bad thing?:: Xander asked.

::Yes,:: Spike retorted.

::It’s working,:: Xander admitted. ::Let’s kick ass, hmm?::

They stepped inside just in time to meet Lilah running out of the kitchen, wooden meat tenderizer in hand. Wesley smirked. How like Lilah; she was ever perfecting the castrating bitch role. “Beating you meat?” Wesley asked the lawyer.

Lilah glanced at the mallet, and then tossed it on the floor. She knew it would prove useless against these three men. “Come by for a little group play?” She asked coyly. “You might have been fun, Wes, but I don’t do the whole ménage a…”

“I wouldn’t fuck you if you were the last snatch on earth,” Xander spat.

“Why not? You’ve done just about everything else,” Lilah replied. “Slayers, demons…”

Spike growled and removed his glasses, as did Xander. “You called the Vraiyl.”

“Me?” Lilah said innocently. “I don’t think so.”

“She’s lying,” Spike told Wesley.

“Wrong answer,” Wesley said, letting his power slip into his voice. “You called the Vraiyl. Why?”

Lilah’s eyes glazed over as his voice commanded her. “We want the Altenalium.”

“Why?” Wesley pressed.

The lawyer struggled to free herself, but couldn’t. “It’s power… when it’s unbalanced, we can control it.”

“What is the power for?” The ex Watcher pressed.

“What else?” Lilah snapped. “Power is a commodity.”

“She’s lying,” Spike said quickly. “They want something specific.”

“They want to trap the Oracles,” Xander said suddenly. He’d been staring at Lilah’s sofa for several minutes. “With the Altenalium. Then people like Angel would be without direction.”

“And you risked calling on the Vraiyl for that?” Wesley said incredulously. Lilah quaked at the raw energy in that voice. Maybe they’d underestimated these men. Spike certainly didn’t seem to be the least bit worn or hurt—and neither did the others.

“We have them under control,” Lilah told him slowly. “They work for us.”

All three men laughed. “You stupid bitch,” Wesley grated out. “The Vraiyl work for no one. They’re playing with you. When you stop being entertaining, they’ll escape and start ruining this world just like they’ve ruined every other place they’ve touched.”

Wesley stepped forward until he was right in Lilah’s face. “We’re just here to warn you, Lilah. Stay away from us. Whatever little plans you have, cancel them. We will stop the Vraiyl at any cost, even if you die in the process. In fact, that might be considered a benefit.” He made sure his voice was strong enough to wilt her into a puddle on the carpet. A single glance collected the others and they walked out, leaving Lilah in her living room, staring out the hole that used to be covered by her door.

•••

::That was annoying,:: Xander said as they piled into his car. ::Can we not ever do that again?::

::Did you pack the lube, or do we have to ask Angel for his?:: Spike inquired.

Wesley grabbed the steering wheel before Xander wrecked them. ::No, we don’t have to do that again and no, none of us packed any lubricant,:: Wesley gasped out.

Xander took several minutes to stop laughing. ::Spike, you are so evil.::

Spike grinned. ::Old habits die hard, mate.::

Xander started the car again and resumed their drive home. ::I’m thinking we’d better stop. Angel doesn’t look like the ‘cherry scented lube’ type.::

::Stupid git never used it before,:: Spike thought. ::And he doesn’t need it now that he’s gone for girls.::

::Perhaps we should just stop at a grocery store,:: Wesley suggested. ::We’ve passed several.::

::Can we get cherry?:: Xander asked hopefully.

::If they have it,:: Wesley promised.

When they got into the store, Spike had to forcibly hold Xander back from just running through the aisles. ::This is more than a little reminiscent of Wal Mart,:: He murmured.

“Do they have cherry? Or chocolate?” Xander asked loudly. “Maybe vanilla or peach?”

Wesley directed them to the sexual accessories aisle. This time the surrounding products included deodorant, laxatives and hot water bottles. ::Why must they make this aisle so damned miserable?::

“They have strawberry! All right!” Xander grabbed half a dozen tubes.

“We’re only going to be here a few days,” Spike told the boy. “I’m not sure we need more than two tubes.”

“There is a chance we’ll be here longer than that,” Wesley reminded them. ::If the Vraiyl become an issue…::

Xander glanced at the shelf. The store had recently restocked and had more than thirty tubes. “No problem there, Wes.” He emptied the shelf into their little basket. “None at all.”

Wesley shrugged and led them to the front of the store. He picked up the tab on the lube, loving the way the little old man at the register stared at them. It might have been the lube… or it might have been the way Xander stared at Spike’s ass while the redhead leaned over to pick up a grocery bag that had fallen to the floor.

::Let’s go torture Angel,:: Spike said as they collected their purchase.

“Can I be on bottom this time?” Xander asked them as the automatic doors open. “Please?”

Wesley and Spike were still laughing when they got back to the hotel. ::Still not freaking out?:: Spike asked Xander as he parked the car.

“I just announced my desire to be reamed to a dozen customers in a supermarket,” Xander said. “While buying enough lube to grease a clan of Fyarl demons. Yeah, I think I’m over the freaking.”

Angel was waiting for them when they returned. To the threesome’s relief, Cordelia and the others were absent. “So, were are we staying?” Xander asked as he took a seat on the stairs.

“Staying?” Angel echoed. “You’re going to stay?”

“You want us to fight your bad guys. We need a place to stay,” Xander explained.

“Did you get rid of the Vraiyl?” Angel asked.

“No,” Wesley snapped. “We tracked them to Wolfram & Hart. And you know what that means, don’t you? By the way, Lilah was good enough to confirm for us that they’re behind this little fiasco.”

Angel growled at the men. “Cordelia had a vision.”

“Her visions are not infallible. Wolfram & Hart want the Altenalium power. To get it, they convinced you and the others that we had to be sent to get it,” Wesley told Angel. He used his abilities to force the vampire to listen. “Yes, I know you didn’t want to send me, but you never really considered not sending anyone, did you? They picked us because they thought we were weak. Now we have to fight the Vraiyl, who will escape Wolfram & Hart, and the law firm itself, who want to destroy the Oracles with the Altenalium. Your cooperation isn’t necessary, but if you stand in our way we will remove you. Forcefully.”

Angel wanted to argue, to fight and maybe kill someone. He couldn’t though. Even if Wesley wasn’t holding him down with his voice, he knew he’d never stand a chance against the three men. He had actually seen them working together before. It had been impressive. They were dangerous. “You can stay here, if you can find a room clean enough to use.”

“Fine,” Xander said quickly, reaching for their meager belongings. Food, lube and a change of clothes was all they had. “Come on,” He told the others. “I’m tired.”

::No you’re not,:: Spike said.

::Guys? I have an idea of where to stay,:: Xander retorted.

::We cannot stay in Angel’s room,:: Wesley snapped. ::Unless we change the sheets first.::

Xander caught Spike before he could fall. This was going to be a blast. He carried the redhead into Angel’s bedroom, laughing at the dark-and-broody décor. “Sheets?”

Wesley found a fresh set in the linen closet and helped the others put them on the bed. “He is going to be very angry.”

“He said any room that was clean enough to use. We just made it clean enough,” Xander defended.

“Not for long,” Spike warned. ::Besides, you *like* making Angel angry.::

::True,:: Wesley replied. ::So…::

::You two already know what I want,:: Xander said casually as he pulled off his shirt. ::The rest I leave up to our engineer, Spike.::

Spike grinned. Yeah, he was the coordinator, wasn’t he? ::I doubt he’ll want to do *that* right now,:: Wesley told Spike. The redhead shrugged and tried another idea.

::Woah. Can we do that?:: Xander inquired. ::The other one looked a lot simpler.::

::Of course we can,:: Spike admonished him. Besides, if the boy wanted to be in charge, so be it. Spike would enjoy whatever they did.

::I’m game,:: Xander said. ::Will you two get naked?::

Wesley happily obliged, although Xander lent him a hand. Of course, Xander’s help ran along more along the lines of distraction. ::He’s never going to get that shirt off if you keep that up,:: Spike reminded Xander. The young man lifted his head from Wesley’s neck, a completely unconvincing guilty look on his face.

::You wanna help him instead?:: Xander asked the redhead.

::He’s done now,:: Spike murmured. Indeed, Wesley had finished while Spike had distracted the boy.

Xander shrugged and reached for Spike, whom he tossed on the slick sheets. He jumped onto the bed right after Spike landed, feeling Wesley join them a moment later. Spike recovered and pinned Xander to the bed, stroking the young man’s skin while Wesley kissed him. ::Lube,:: Xander begged, glancing at Spike.

::In a hurry?:: Spike asked as he grabbed at the bag of lubricant. It broke, sending tubes flying all around the room. He caught one, holding it out to Xander. The brunette took the tube eagerly, slicking up Spike’s fingers. Meanwhile, Wesley turned to Spike, giving him the same slow, thorough treatment Xander had gotten. Spike obliged Xander, stroking at his entrance while Wesley ravished his mouth.

Xander squirmed under Spike’s ministrations and watched the two men kissing, struck by the eroticism of watching them. He could feel Wesley’s tongue in Spike’s mouth, teasing the redhead. When Wesley finally released Spike, both men returned to Xander. Wesley bent his head to one coppery nipple, laving and nipping at it, while Spike slowly worked at loosening Xander up. The combined sensations of all three of them made Xander relax very quickly and soon Spike managed to work two fingers inside, stretching and searching for the boy’s prostate.

::Aaah!:: Xander squeaked when big, bright flashes of *something* went off in his head. Wesley and Spike shuddered, feeling their own bodies react in sympathy. Xander grabbed at Wesley, desperate to have something to hold onto, some kind of anchor. What he was feeling was feeding into the others, and he felt that too and all of a sudden if he didn’t come *right now* bad things were going to happen.

Wesley let Xander move him to the head of the bed while Spike continued to torture the boy. ::Xander,:: Spike murmured through the fog in his head, ::How’re you doing?::

::How does it fucking feel like I’m doing?:: Xander screamed. ::I’m about to die. Why didn’t you *tell* me it felt like that?::

::You already knew?:: Wesley suggested. ::You felt it last time, remember?::

::Not the same,:: Xander moaned. ::Definitely better this way.:: He wanted Spike inside him five minutes ago, and he didn’t mind sharing that thought one bit. Or the one that came after it.

Spike growled, and removed his hand. If the boy wanted it, he was gonna get it. The redhead slathered his cock in lube and moved into position. Just as he was about to warn Xander, Spike was hit by Xander’s next desire.

As was Wesley.

The ex Watcher shivered. ::Are you sure?::

::Stop asking me that,:: Xander demanded. ::You’re the first guy I’ve ever heard of question someone who offers them a blow job.::

::When you put it that way,:: Spike commented. ::Xander?::

Wesley let Spike and Xander maneuver him into position, leaning over the boy’s mouth. Xander swallowed him immediately, much to Wesley’s surprise. Then Spike started to move forward, sinking himself inside Xander. The boy’s mouth stopped moving briefly. Then he moaned, which was exquisite enough to make Wesley drop his head onto the pillow and quake.

Spike’s eyes crossed as he slowly thrust into Xander, feeling tight heat surrounding him. Before long he had to close his eyes; the vision of Xander eagerly suckling Wesley’s cock whilst getting reamed was too much. He already had to feel what Wesley felt as Xander sucked him off; seeing it was… He was too aroused and far too close to coming to watch. If he didn’t find something to distract himself soon, he wasn’t going to last.

::What do you think I’m doing?:: Xander muttered.

::Wesley?:: Spike replied.

::So should you,:: Xander shot back. Wesley just groaned. Who’d have thought Xander would be the one to think that up?

Spike saw what Xander had in mind and wholeheartedly agreed. Making Wesley scream would be fun. The redhead leaned forward, still moving inside Xander. The first touch of his tongue against Wesley’s skin was electric; the ex Watcher jumped and groaned. Spike didn’t pause; he simply threw himself into the task, massaging Wesley’s hole with his tongue, pushing at the muscle. Wesley worked himself between Xander and Spike, sinking into a wet heaven and pushing back onto a devilish tongue.

Xander hummed happily around Wesley’s cock, reveling in the echoes he got from the other men. He was going to have to have that done to him soon; Wesley was nearly incoherent with pleasure from Spike’s tongue. Then again, Xander was having a hard time thinking when Spike was busy drilling into him, stroking his prostate with every thrust.

The three men were utterly consumed with each other and didn’t notice when the bedroom door opened. Cordelia sailed in to change clothes after a long day. She stopped about three steps in when she kicked a tube of strawberry lube. “What’s with the…” The seer picked it up, reading the label on the tube. Then she heard groaning. A single glance at the bed told her way more than she needed to know. “Holy shit. Angel!” She screamed loudly.

Angel bounded up the stairs, hearing Cordelia’s frantic, distressed cry. He burst into his room, where she was standing, only to see his bed full of…”Oh god.”

“Please tell me the lube is theirs,” Cordelia said desperately.

Xander took Wesley all the way in and swallowed, knowing the ex Watcher was close. Spike thrust once, twice more and froze, filling Xander with hot come. Between Wesley’s climax and Spike’s, Xander was overwhelmed. He screamed around Wesley’s softening cock and convulsed, nearly unconscious from pleasure.

Wesley flopped to the side, taking his weight off Xander. Spike pulled out slowly and lay down on the other side of the boy, drawing both men near. Then he saw Angel and Cordelia. “Well?”

Xander glanced over at Angel and Cordelia. ::They didn’t see us, right?::

::I rather think they did,:: Wesley replied.

::I’m gonna die now,:: Xander wailed.

::Why? They got a good show,:: Spike told him.

::It’s Angel. Angel saw us having sex,:: Xander whined.

::We’re also in his bed,:: Spike said.

“Are you planning on using that, Ms. Chase?” Wesley asked, gesturing to the tube of lube in her hand. Cordelia let go of the tube like it had turned into a snake.

“You’re in my bed,” Angel stated.

“Oh. This is yours?” Spike said innocently.

“Wesley knows it is,” Angel growled.

“And a damned fine bed it is,” Xander said cheerfully. “In fact, I’d wager we stay in it a lot while we’re here.”

“So unless you two want to join in on the fun, I’d recommend you toddle off,” Spike said lightly. “’Cause I’m thinking we’re about ready for round two.”